35 WEEKS - THE RUDEST SNORE

3rd trimester scan results are in. He's head down and dropping into place! Praise baby Jesus! He's measuring 5 lbs 5 oz, which the doc says is right on schedule.  Doctor estimated a max birthweight of 7 lbs 8 oz...so hooray for no 10 lb babies.  Strong heart beat, moving around, looking cute and when I asked "is that the placenta?" the doc said "Nope. That is actually his scrotum and penis, you have a very big boy, you should be proud".  So there you have it folks...he's got a large wiener. I'll practice some decorum and not post the dick pic this time.  Wouldn't want to make any of my male readers jealous. 

Don't judge the leopard bra...bras are weird when they get bigger lol

HOW FAR ALONG:
35 weeks. Ahhhh SO CLOSE. CAN'T WAIT!!!

WEIGHT GAIN:
22 lbs...still holding pretty steady.

SYMPTOMS:
Imagine you're sleeping....you're sleeping...and sleeping and all of a sudden you wake to what sounds like a 7th grader with headgear and a pretty severe sinus infection trying to inhale. That noise...that noise my friend was coming from me.  It was the loudest, rudest snore of my life.  So loud I woke myself up, the dogs up...and a very disturbed Anthony who I could feel judging me even though it was super dark in the room.  I guess I snore now.

Besides snoring, I'm not sure anything else is "new".  I thought I might've gotten my first hemorrhoid, but that was a false alarm. I'm pretty paranoid about getting one. This has actually been the BEST week of my entire pregnancy.  Didn't think I'd say that in the 3rd trimester, but it's true.  Sure I'm uncomfortable, have heartburn, etc etc etc, but those are all normal pregnancy things I signed up for and expected. This week, has been the ONLY week where it was all normal and manageable.  I felt like Kristen, only pregnant...not like I couldn't breathe or that something was seriously wrong.

Sprained ankle still has me limping like Keyser Soze.  And it's a little weird how he's dropped so low.  

Because it always feels like he might fall out of my vagina, but that's probably overestimating him and underestimating my vagina.

CRAVINGS:
Ice chips...so many ice chips. Hope I don't turn into one of those weirdos on My Strange Addiction who starts eating rocks or drywall.

SLEEP:
Would be okay if I could shut up the obnoxious woman who snores and also shares a body with me.

BELLY BUTTON, STRETCH MARKS, AND WEDDING RINGS:
Belly button has disappeared. Basically I'm Eve... or Kyle XY.  I miss my wedding ring :/ No stretch marks besides the underboob ones.

EXERCISE: 
Yoga and...my dance thang.  I swam a couple times.  Although it's a bit creepy right now when I swim b/c Anthony goes underwater with his neon orange nose clip and stares at me.  I told him to stop, but he swears he can see where the baby is when I swim and "its cool".  So I don't know...I guess I may go for a swim stalking later.  Just see if I'm feeling like being ogled and objectified. (answer...I totally am).  Also here is some video of my new ab workout.

EXCITED:
For Anthony to stop saying "Ugh I wish he'd get here already"...as if the pregnancy is such a nuisance for HIM lol  I just stare at him and slowly squint one eye, burning a hatred laser into his skull and think...oh YOU wish he'd get here already...YOU? Ah yes waiting must be so hard for YOU. Tell me more about how over growing a human you are.  

MISSING:
Onions, hot sauce, spicy food, no heartburn, no back pain and SLEEPING ON MY STOMACH! Roll on Sept...roll ON!