DAY 2 - WHY IS BEING SKINNY SO HARD?

Dear baby Jesus in heaven, why? Why is being skinny so hard? Why is wine so delicious and broccoli so shit? Do you think you're hilarious or something? 

Heres what I know. I woke up this morning and could barely sit my torso up. Everything hurt. It hurt to sit down on the toilet, because well ...it's a squat. It hurt to pick up my giant baby...because its a squat. Funny how you quickly realize that everything in life requires some muscle.

I did NOT want to work out, but alas...I feel accountable to the internet now because I had some genius idea to blog and make a big deal about it. Good work Kristen. So today was Cardio Cross Train which is 45 minutes...and Ab Assassin which is 25 minutes. As soon as I started CCT I was like there's no way...there's just no way, but then...it actually loosened my muscles up a bit and made me fee a little better. Ab Assassin? Ya well.... once you've given birth you know for certain you can do anything.

I'm trying to maximize my time these days, so my thoughts were...I'll just try and work out while Killian is awake, so I can actually get stuff done during his naps, like...cleaning, cooking, showering...you know, relaxing things like that lol Well I had to start and stop 6 times today. Each time I took a deep breath, hit pause and committed to come back to it. The first time he was hungry. So I had a workout within a workout...breastfeeding/cardio inception. The second time he was hungry for non boobs, so we had to walk to the kitchen, pick out our food and have a snack break. Then the third time was because he needed attention. So I stopped and we went for a walk around the neighborhood. The fourth time was because ...well apparently he wanted me to watch him put all his toys in the basket. The fifth time was because he wanted to go for a stroll around the house kicking things and opening cabinets. The sixth time was because he shit himself....and all the deep breathing I was doing, was giving me a poo high. So I stopped...6 times. But I came back each time and I finished. And for that...I'm proud of myself.

I'm thinking I might "periscope" or "facebook live" my workout tomorrow. In case anyone wants to work out along with me. I'll see how it goes...might make it a thing. Have to decide on which one to use though...and I know nothing of either. Could end up being a shit show.

THOUGHTS I HAD WHILE WORKING OUT TODAY

1. Its freeing being able to fart while working out with no judgmental looks.
2. Definitely gotta vacuum under the couch
3. I literately have 11 weeks and 5 more days to go.
4. I hope I don't She-Hulk. I just want a Kate Hudson body...is that so hard?
5. When is this kid gonna gain some independence and stop climbing on me?
6. I should live stream this so people can work out with me or at least laugh
7. I wonder if it's legal to stream a workout I didn't create
8. If I stream it I won't be able to fart.
9. Nah they probably won't hear it.
10. So would I wear my normal pj's? or get all fancy with yoga pants and a sports bra?
11. God I'm so sore. Why is it still round 1?
12. I wonder if Anthony will start working out since I am

FOOD

BREAKFAST
Almond Milk
Kashi Go Lean Crunch

SNACK
Organic Applesauce

LUNCH
3 eggs
7 giant organic strawberries
2 trader joes potato pancakes

SNACK
None

DINNER
Cauliflower Rice, Onions and Gorgonzola Cheese
Chicken with a lemon tarragon sauce made by yours truly.

2 tbsp. unsalted butter
2 tbsp. all purpose flour
2 c. milk- anything but skim
Salt, to taste
White pepper, to taste
1 tbsp. dried tarragon
Zest from 1/2 lemon
Juice from 1/2 lemo

SNACK
Dark chocolate chips 80% cocao